7 Self-Love Resolutions for a Powerful New Year

7 Self-Love Resolutions for a Powerful New Year | Jessica Says

Hello, gorgeous creatures! As you know (mainly because I haven’t shut up about it for the past few weeks), the New Year is so close I can almost taste it and I am beside myself with excitement! The time for planning, goal-setting and plotting for an outrageously fantastic 2015 is upon us and I couldn’t be happier. Today, I’d like to do a little something different: instead of the standard New Year’s resolution posts which tend to be flush with promises to lose weight, stop smoking, earn x amount of money and so on, I’m challenging you, lovely reader, to focus on yourself in a more positive way with 7 self-love resolutions for the best year ever!

These are all things that I will be focusing on in 2015 and I’d be absolutely thrilled if you joined me for some or all of them. So often, we get caught up in the frenzied madness of the year’s end and forget that while getting your hands on more cash is brilliant, feeling happier and more content with ourselves is far, far more important and worthwhile. These resolutions will help you focus on what really matters and set you on the right path for a wonderful year!



Give yourself your own blessing.

We humans are complicated creatures: we love getting in our own way and are notoriously bad at giving ourselves permission to look after number one. To be fair, it’s not our fault: I personally believe society has conditioned us to think we’re selfish for wanting to explore self-love. This is, of course, total bull and the time has come to set things straight! You are absolutely deserving of your own time, affection and attention.

Let 2015 be the year you give yourself your own blessing: your blessing to reach for reach for big, bold goals; to pamper yourself with wild abandon and to put yourself first, for a change.


Fill your feel-good quota.

In our daily lives, we are often required to do things we don’t necessarily enjoy. (DUH, Jessica. I know, I know, bear with me.) Some of these unpleasant things may be avoidable (and therefore require decisive action on your part to get rid of them, STAT), but others just aren’t that easy to shake off. The secret to having a brilliant life, then, is to crowd the bad stuff out with the good.

This means identifying activities and people that make you feel amazing and maximising your time spent on or with them so that your feel-good quota is filled. If you don’t know where to start, make a list of all the things that make you happy. It can be anything: from eating ice cream in bed on a Sunday morning to long walks with coffee and your bestie in tow, nothing is off the table. Be as expansive as possible – you’ll want plenty of options to choose from!

Once you’ve done this, pick three items on the list and commit to doing them THIS WEEK. Rinse, lather and repeat, changing activities every week until you’ve gone through all of them; then, either create a new list or repeat your favourites. You’ve given yourself permission to love yourself; now get started!


Live boldly.

Just as we are hesitant to put ourselves first for fear of seeming selfish, oftentimes we aren’t very good at living boldly, either. Whether that means setting big and potentially terrifying goals, going on epic adventures, choosing to think and behave differently from others because we simply don’t gel with their values or carping that bloody diem like our lives depended on it (news flash: they do), we tend to hold ourselves back. Why? Because we’re afraid of jeopardising our hard-earned security, breaking the mould and putting ourselves out there.

It’s an uncomfortable but undeniable truth, and I used to notice it in my own life and decisions all the time. Fear of failure held me back from even considering pursuing my dreams, while fear of what other people thought of me prevented me from being my true self. By discovering radical self-love and finally understanding my true worth, I was able to shed many of those fears; but of course, I still have a lot to work on, which is why living boldly is definitely on my list of resolutions this year!

My message to you is this: no matter how afraid you are, these limitations you feel shackled by can be overcome. Set the intention to live boldly this year and step out of your comfort zone as often as you can. Start by doing one thing that scares you a little every week and take it from there! It’s when we stretch ourselves that we grow the most.


Move more.

This is (partly) a fitness blog after all, so it’d be strange if I didn’t mention exercise, wouldn’t it? ;) As you already know, working out regularly has countless physical and mental benefits which on their own should already have you lacing up your running shoes or making your way to the gym; but as I wrote in my recent article on why I get my sweat on, I do it because it makes me feel sexy, powerful and unstoppable and if that isn’t radical self-love, I don’t know what is!

Give your body, mind and soul a gift this year and commit to moving more. It doesn’t have to be anything drastic – no one’s asking you to sign up for a half-marathon (although if you feel up to it, why the hell not!) – but make a point to increase your physical activity in 2015. If you were completely sedentary in 2014, try adding a couple of walks a week to your lunch break; if you exercised inconsistently, try finding a schedule that works for you and do your utmost to stick to it. We only have one body – nurture it accordingly. 


Be truly present.

There is a lot of talk about mindfulness going around at the moment, so chances are you have a working understanding of its precepts (if not, Leo Babauta’s Zen Habits is a wonderful resource on the topic); but how present and aware are you in your daily life? If you’re anything like me, you spend a lot of your time switching between innumerable open tabs in your browser, while simultaneously furiously refreshing your Twitter and Instagram feeds on your smartphone; but how often do you actually step away from technology and make the conscious effort to just be in the moment?

I’ve experimented with mindfuless on several occasions: once, when my beloved iPhone was stolen from me and I was forced to take stock of life without it and my addiction to it (dramatic, I know); another, when my other half and I challenged ourselves to dine mindfully for a week. I learned a tremendous amount about myself on both occasions and I now warm-heartedly recommend a similar experiment to others.

Being more mindful has enabled me to get more done by single-tasking and developing laser-like focus on the job at hand; it has also allowed me to reconnect with my beloved partner and enjoy the moment more. Frankly, it’s pretty great and being more present will definitely be high on my list of priorities this year. What about you?



Let go of toxic relationships.

I’ve written at length about the importance of surrounding yourself with positive, loving people and with reason: being blessed with a strong posse that has your back can be instrumental in helping you achieve your goals and generally being a happier, more well-rounded person. Similarly, being plagued by negative, toxic people who quite literally suck the energy out of the room (and, conversely, you) isn’t very conducive to a joyful and productive life at all.

Just as you might need some time to learn how to give yourself permission to put yourself first, you may need to take baby steps with cutting these people out of your life, and that’s 100% OK; just know that your time, energy and happiness are far more important than these Negative Nancys’ need to gossip and pollute the world around them with their toxic vibes.


Give yourself a break.

We are so bloody hard on ourselves, aren’t we? With competition heating up around us and expectations being pushed ever higher, it can be difficult to know when giving it our all is productive and useful, and when it actually does us more harm than good. Trust me, I know: as a full-time digital marketer with long hours and a blogger/freelance writer with a social life, a boyfriend and a healthy obsession for keeping fit, time is already hard to come by; add a sprinkling of latent (oh, okay, raging) perfectionism to the mix, and you’ve got yourself a bit of a stress time bomb on your hands.

I’m the worst at giving myself a break: my standards are very high (both for myself and others) and I tend to not make life easy for myself by taking on tons of projects at the same time.  As a result, time is a very rare commodity and I do have to deal with extremely stressful situations at times. This is the life I’ve chosen, though, and I absolutely love it; it therefore behooves me to find a way to do it all, all the while being kind to myself when things occasionally fall apart.

It’s not easy, but it’s oh-so-important and I’ve found that remembering that I don’t have to be Superwoman, that failures should be celebrated, that progress is more important than perfection and that negative self-talk is utter crap helps.


I hope you enjoyed these self-love resolutions! Did any of them resonate with you? Will you be including any of them in your resolutions for 2015? Please share in the comments! 


15 Brilliant Things I’ve Learned in One Year of Blogging: Part 1

15 Brilliant Things I've Learned In One Year Of Blogging: Part 1 | Jessica Says

Hello, lovely people! Did the title of this post take you by surprise? Good, because me, too! I can’t quite wrap my head around the fact that Jessica Says (and its former incarnation, Fierce in the City) has been around for just over a year now. It feels as though it was just yesterday that I announced the launch of this, my little slice of the Internet, on December 1st 2013! Time has positively flown by, hasn’t it?! So much so, in fact, that the reason why I haven’t made a big song and dance about this most important of dates is not that I’m not into celebrating birthdays (are you joking, if it were up to me, I’d have a birthmonth); it’s because with all the other madness in my life (I’m revealing everything soon, promise), the Big Day has completely snuck up on me! Terrible, isn’t it?

All senior moments aside, Jessica Says is now one year old (crazy town!) and people, it’s been an exhilarating ride! In just twelve short months, I rebranded and relaunched my blog; I met some truly fantastic people who inspire me to do my best every single day; I discovered my writing voice and pushed my limits with challenges left, right and centre; I uncovered my personal aesthetic and am more confident than ever when it comes to creating visual content… Above all else, though, I’ve made some incredible discoveries within the realm of blogging and because I love you, I’m going to share them with you!

Some of these lessons may seem obvious to the more seasoned blogging veterans out there, but all of them were instrumental in making Jessica Says what it is today: a successful blog that brings me incalculable amounts of joy! Ready to get your learning on?

This is Part One in a three-part series. Sign up to my weekly updates to ensure you don’t miss the next posts!

Keep reading after the jump for my 15 brilliant blog-related discoveries!

7 Gorgeous Items on My Christmas Wishlist

7 Gorgeous Things on my Christmas Wishlist | Jessica Says

Hello, megababes! I’m in a materialistic mood today, aren’t you? It must have something to do with Christmas drawing nearer by the hour, but man - all this online shop browsing and gift purchasing for my family has me itching to do highly unreasonable things with my credit card! Must… Resist…! What I love doing in times like these is torture myself further by curating a beautiful and 100% unrealistic wishlist. You know the drill: these are the things you wish, wish, wish Santa would slide under your Christmas tree for being such a good girl, because you know full well you can’t afford them yourself. Ouch.

Having said that, not all of the seven gorgeous items on my wishlist are ridiculously expensive, and I may well have to treat myself to a few of them in the New Year… But in the mean time, let’s “ooh” and “aah” over some incredibly aesthetically pleasing objects, shall we? It is Christmas, after all!

Read on after the jump to see my most coveted wishlist items this year!